Our vision is to provide a platform to find a mentor, regardless of where someone is in their career or life; starting out, eager to progress, ready to move on or slow down, maybe returning from a break. We are non-sector specific and have a team of mentors from all sorts of careers backgrounds and businesses.
Mentors for Women aims to be a place of inspiration, a place to share our stories both personal and professional, a place to check in and see what is new, a place to be and a space to grow.
Our bespoke mentoring system will manage the mentoring process and measure success, based on completion of the relationship and outcome of both the mentoring need and the objectives agreed between the mentor and mentee, giving confidence that the experience will be exactly what is needed.
- All mentors create a profile detailing their skills, experience, and availability
- Mentees identify those attributes important to them and are presented with mentor profiles that match
- Mentees opt for a maximum of 3 mentors for an informal discussion, before making their choice
- Each mentor receives notification of the outcome of the mentee’s decision with feedback for those not chosen
- The mentor and mentee draw up a mentoring agreement for 3 mentoring sessions
- Details of the agreement are entered into the mentoring system to support tracking and remuneration
- When complete, if the mentee wishes to extend the relationship and the mentor agrees, a new agreement is drawn up on the system
- Throughout the relationship, progress against objectives is entered into the system to monitor the progress
- Confidential feedback for both mentors and mentees is required at the end of each relationship
The Benefits of Mentoring
Research carried out by McKinsey & Co has shown that companies with the greatest gender diversity on their executive teams are 21% more likely to outperform peers on profitability and 27% more likely to create superior value. However, according to a global survey by leadership advisory firm Egon Zehnder, nearly half of women report not having access to the kind of senior leaders who could serve as effective mentors.
Formal mentoring programs help organisations retain employees, increase job satisfaction and commitment, and cultivate organisational values and behaviours. When done right, mentoring helps people take positive steps forward in their careers—which also helps develop the talent pool for that organisation.
Having a diversity of mentors as well as a diversity of mentees, such as provided by Mentors for Women, can expand a person’s perspectives, and help them grow more intentionally and effectively. Mentoring that crosses lines in both directions in all sorts of ways…race, ethnicity and national origin, sexual and gender identity, age, ability, class background, etc. is so much more powerful.
Mentor/mentee relationships do not need to echo traditional privilege structures or go only one way across lines of difference; we all have so much to learn from each other, we all have stories to share about how we bring our full selves to work, how we succeed and thrive, how we achieve results, and we all can do better by learning from those stories.
Mentoring is about helping others develop in a positive way and more effectively. It is a relationship designed to build confidence and support the mentee so that they can take control of their own development and progress. It is trust-based and confidential and should help them to feel valued, represented, productive, self-fulfilled and rewarded. Mentors use their knowledge and experience to support mentees to develop skills, identifying goals, opportunities to learn and find their own solutions to overcome issues. Mentorship is key to everyone’s personal and professional growth.
The Effective Mentor
Mentors listen and give their time, support, encourage and challenge, provide a framework to look at options and to plan future action, share experiences where relevant, signpost information and resources – including people/networks.
Mentors do not collaborate, get involved in employment matters or directly act on behalf of a mentee. They also do not provide references or judge the actions the mentee takes.
They will invest their time in the relationship. By giving the mentee space, encouraging reflection and regular feedback they will allow the mentee to have autonomy to select issues, to consider options, and make their own decisions. They may offer appropriate self-disclosure, confidentiality sharing professional savvy.
They create rapport in the relationship, listening, reflecting back and summarising the discussion through asking and answering questions and offering insightful perspective. They will always remember that the mentee is the expert on their own life!
They will guide the mentee to have realistic ambitions, to take responsibility for the outcomes while being open to challenge and being challenged. Openness, good humour and respect from both parties is essential to a good mentoring relationship.
Key Mentoring Skills
Being a mentor is a challenging, stimulating and hugely rewarding experience. A mentor has a genuine interest in helping others develop and gets great satisfaction out of sharing their learning and experiences. Research has shown that just about anyone can be a mentor because it’s not necessarily about having all the information at their fingertips for the correct answer to any query, it is about prompting the mentee to find out the answers to their own questions. At Mentors for Women training is readily available through a mixture of mediums to develop the key skills required to be a mentor.
- Building rapport: By subtly matching non-verbal communication – especially voice patterns and eye contact patterns; by careful choice of language – positive and open; by using an appropriate style and tone and humour (with care); by sharing stories and interests; by offering resources; by developing a genuine interest in the other person and in their model of the world
- Listening: The quality of someone’s thinking is related to the quality of the attention of the listener. To be an active listener it is essential to be present, to see, to focus, to feel, to think, to hear. Providing time and space, so the mentee can hear themselves think; encouraging and building their confidence
- Asking Questions: By checking the mentee’s assumptions, what is limiting their thinking, and are their assumptions true. By asking open questions – What? How? What If? Can you tell me more about that? By probing and clarifying
- Answering Questions: By offering insightful perspective, reflecting back & summarising: By drawing out key issues and learning; by repeating the mentee’s key statements and thoughts, using the same vocabulary and tone; by not making assumptions or adding value judgements; by not reflecting back negative or self-deprecating comments; by checking that they have understood. It helps the mentee to hear their thoughts distilled – including what they stress and/or omit
- Emotional Intelligence: By understanding their own moods and emotions and how these impact others; through self-regulation; through empathy
- Not being a therapist: By being aware of when conversations are straying into the realms of therapy and when to ensure mentees obtain more appropriate help
- Checking effectiveness of the session: By asking what is working and what isn’t, what does the mentee need, what can be done differently? By noticing their own reactions and behaviours and the mentee’s responses.
Distance mentoring
The same general principles of effective mentoring apply. The mentor must work to build the relationship, paying particular attention to communication skills. It will be harder to establish rapport and distractions are more likely. Confidentiality and privacy need specific attention, and both parties should ensure no-one else can hear and/or see the conversation. Technical issues can be more of a problem.
There are actions which can be taken; Firstly, it should be agreed at the outset what methods will be used, documenting this in a mentoring agreement. When on video calls it can help to place the other person’s image near the camera and turn off the ‘self-view’ capability to prevent distractions. Finding a private room/space and notifying others that the call is personal will give privacy. Mentors will always have a backup plan.
Modelling the mentoring space
Frameworks can be helpful to maintain focus and stretch in a mentoring relationship, especially for distance mentoring. A mentor will often use a framework or model to give structure to discussions and sharing this can help the mentee understand the mentor’s approach and help the relationship to be more effective. There are several models in general use, and a simple framework would be:
Check in – Focus on issues – Review
One useful tool that we discuss further in the Mentors for Women training sessions is the OSCAR Coaching Model (Gilbert & Whittleworth 2009) which is similar to the GROW Model used in coaching:
Review (On Track?) – What is the Impact?
Actions – What Will You Do?
Choices – Look at Your Options
Situation – Understand Your Context
Outcome – Agree Objectives
Another model is the 5 C Model. This model (Pegg, 1999) supports a mentee who wants to focus on a particular set of challenges or has a range of options to decide between. The 5 Cs are:
Challenges – an issue or problem the mentee is currently facing
Choices – the options available to them for dealing with that issue or problem
Consequences – the consequences of choosing one option over another
Creative solutions – other solutions that the mentor and mentee might come up with during their discussion
Conclusions – a decision about what to do next and a commitment to act
Finding a Mentor
We recommend that the Mentee spends some time considering what their Mentoring Need is; this information is held in the membership profile, and should always be kept up to date. The Mentee should also produce some objectives and have these documented in the system. They may well change, and there is a facility to change them and add notes. Proper thought to objectives at the outset will have an impact on the type of Mentor sought. It also helps the Mentor when they are preparing for the informal meeting to have as much information as possible about what the Mentee wants to achieve. We also recommend that the Mentee attends Webinar 1 – An Introduction to Mentoring, to understand what to expect. Finally it is important that the Mentee has made a first pass at preparing the mentoring agreement, which can be downloaded here.
The informal meeting
The first 15-minute meeting will be used by the mentee to choose a mentor from up to three initially identified as matching their requirements. It is not a formal meeting, it is not chargeable and will not have a set agenda. It should be an open and honest discussion about the mentee’s aims and objectives for the mentoring sessions.
The meeting is an introduction to each other, with both parties asking questions that are relevant to being able to build a good relationship and work together. Each party will have been able to review the profile of the other party which should help in the initial meeting. It is essential when completing profiles that everyone gives some insight into their “essence”. This should help the mentee make initial choices, and the mentor prepare for the 15 minutes meeting. The mentor should direct the conversation to develop an initial rapport between both parties, or highlight, in a non-judgmental way, any barriers to establishing a meaningful mentoring relationship. It is no reflection on either party if this rapport cannot be established, and they mutually decide that the mentee should meet with another mentor.
The meeting should establish:
The mentee’s needs and aims, and what they want to get from mentoring. The mentee’s objectives ensuring they are SMART.
(Specific; Measurable; Achievable; Realistic; Timebound)
Consider what to include in the mentoring agreement, timescales – achievable timescales & availability.
What might be difficult in the mentoring relationship? What can be done to maximise success?
This first meeting will also confirm the future meeting format, including location, agenda, action fulfilment and ongoing communication methods and frequency. This will enable both parties to ensure that they are able to build a good relationship to meet the objectives.
The Mentors for Women team are on-hand to give any support necessary. We have a policy of ‘no-blame divorce’ – it is better for a mentee to find a new mentor than to enter into, or continue with, a relationship that does not work.
Mentor – Mentee meetings
The first of the three mentoring sessions contracted will include establishment of a mentoring agreement – a template is available to download here.
The mentee should identify some objectives for the mentoring prior to the first meeting and load these into the system. The objectives should be discussed to ensure they are SMART, (Specific; Measurable; Achievable; Realistic; Timebound) and adjusted in the system if necessary. Before each meeting the mentee sets the meeting agenda, and after the meeting produces a summary of the meeting including issue(s) discussed, the main discoveries/learning and the actions agreed. A regular update of the objectives is required from the mentee after each meeting and at the conclusion of the mentoring relationship feedback for both parties is entered into the system by the mentee. The system only allows the mentee to access the data regarding the relationship. The mentor is however able to view the data.
On-going support and evaluation
The Mentors for Women mentoring scheme is monitored and evaluated and each relationship reviewed on a regular basis. This is:
- To provide and maintain an effective mentoring scheme for all members
- To identify further relevant learning opportunities for all members
In order to achieve these objectives, it is essential that updates are made in regard to each objective and it is part of the mentor’s responsibility to check this is achieved.
For mentors wishing to progress through the levels of mentoring, we recommend the use of a portfolio. The portfolio should record details of each mentoring session in terms of what went well and what you could have gone better. The aim of the portfolio is to show the growth of the mentor.
Although Mentors for Women does not currently offer supervision for mentors, we ask mentors to state on their profile if they are qualified as a supervisor, or if they have a supervisor. Supervisors willing to provide mentors with supervision will be able to add their name to a Supervisors List. Send an email here, with the subject Supervisor.
